Saturday, June 20, 2015

Background

Upon several requests I decided to start writing a blog! I was very hesitant because I of course feel like no one cares, but apparently people actually do! I really want to inspire people, especially other students, to fight weight gain and make their life as great as it possibly can be!

So here's some background.....

When I was 17, I started to gain weight, a lot of weight. In one years time I went from a size 2 pants to a size 10, and I honestly can’t tell you how much weight I gained, because I was too scared to step on a scale. And yeah I was gaining some muscle from sports, but I was mainly gaining fat. It was so easy for me to ignore the weight gain by simply telling myself I was just “curvy” and embracing my "big back porch", as my grandpa would say.

When I began to attend college I looked at the so-called  “Freshman 15” as an inevitable occurrence and in fact I said, “Bring it on,” and it was brought. I gained 13 pounds within 5 months. This had everything to do with the fact that I ate as much as I possibly could at each sitting in the dining hall, and on top of that I lacked motivation to go to the gym.  I would go to a cycling class once a week, but that was the extent of my fitness.

In January, upon coming back to school after winter break, something changed. I had always had anxiety but never as extreme as it became. The anxiety began to become unbearable; I rarely left my dorm room because of the stress. After a few bad anxiety attacks and breakdowns I started to meet with a psychologist every other week, which I absolutely dreaded, but she made me realize why I was always so anxious. After several meetings I realized most of my anxiety was caused by self-consciousness. It all started to make sense.

For months I had not wanted to even walk to class on my own because I was worried that people would think I had no friends. I wouldn't wear clothes that were form fitting because I was worried people would see that I had a big stomach. That was the thing and the problem; I was so worried about what other people were thinking at all times, which led me even further down the path to unhappiness and weight gain.

My weight gain really started to hit me when I traveled to Mississippi for Spring break in late February. I remember thinking about how other people were going to the beach for their spring break and in my head I had wondered how other college students felt comfortable in bathing suits. It took me a while to realize it, but eventually I figured out that a lot of people don’t gain the freshman 15, some people even go to college and lose weight, because they actually utilize the massive gym that the school offers to all of their students and the healthier options in the dining hall. But, on my spring break I didn't have to worry about putting on a small bikini, instead I stuck with my oversized winter sweaters for the winter weather that Mississippi was experiencing.

The first night of my trip to visit my sister, who resides in Oxford, we went out to dinner at our favorite restaurant in “The Square”. As an appetizer I indulged in French fries with duck fat, which I refused to share, and for dinner I enjoyed fried oysters, and at the time, in my mind, you could never have a meal without dessert, so it was peach cobbler and ice cream. I could go through the rest of my meals that I ate there over a four-day period, but just reliving that first meal makes my stomach hurt, so I’ll spare you any additional pain. The weird thing I later realized about this meal was that for me, at the time, this was a normal meal, nothing special or out of the ordinary, just another fat filled meal.
As the weekend progressed I felt sick and I told myself that when I got home I would go to the gym everyday and try to eat semi-healthy food. I didn't go to the gym everyday, but I did go every other day, and I ate significantly healthier than I had been eating, but with that being said I was still enjoying a high carb meal plan. I lost two pounds over spring break, which was just enough to make me consider changing my diet.

When I returned back to school I had told my friend Taylor about my success and I began to go to the gym with her everyday. One night, almost out of the blue, we decided we wanted to get bikini bodies because we only had a month and a half of the semester left and that meant summer was right around the corner. We decided that we would do a thirty-day abs challenge and we planned to go to the gym every night. Coincidently, that night as I was scrolling through my feed on Instagram (Feed- I think that's what you call it), I saw a girl from school post two pictures: one in her bathing suit before losing weight and one after. She looked amazing. The difference was incredible and she achieved a great loss in such a short amount of time. So immediately, in a creepy, I know you but I don’t, way, I messaged her on Facebook asking what exactly she did to get to that point. So I took her advice and I took it even further. I researched weight loss for weeks and came up with my own strategies, because everyone needs their own strategies. But my first step was to take a before picture. I dreaded this.
For about an hour I just stared. I looked into my mirror and stared at my stomach, I couldn't take my eyes off of it. I didn't even put a bathing suit on because I thought that would be too repulsive. So the picture I ended up taking was in a sports bra and my running tights, and I even cheated a bit by lifting my running tights up so my stomach wouldn't be spilling over. I told myself I would look at that picture everyday, and I did.

Three months later,  I have achieved so many goals. I am down thirty pounds, as I had hoped to be, but I expected it to take another month. I have gone even further with my diet in the past month and a half by eliminating artificial flavors and gmos. All of this being said, what really matters is that I am stress free and happier than I have ever been!

Through this blog I hope to inspire and help anyone going through the same process! I will talk about my life (as I love to do) and share workouts and recipes and anything else (requests welcome!!). :)

Here's some transformation pictures:

Pictures from left to right: Before weight loss and One month in (14 lb loss)

Final Photo: 27 lost pounds (three more since this picture!)

2 comments:

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  2. You look so amazing! I've just recently followed you on Instagram and have been reading this amazing blog! You're so inspiring! I would love to achieve the same goals as you!! Did you eat a certain amount of foods or go on a specific diet to lose those initial 30 pounds?

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